God knew what kind of child I would need...

I went to bed last night with so many thoughts running through my head because today is my youngest child’s 6^th birthday {who happens to have autism}.  To have a child with some sort of diagnosis can lead you to feel many things, worry, regret, grief, and fear.  I saw a post this morning from Karen Ehman that said, GOD KNEW WHAT KIND OF MOTHER OUR CHILDREN WOULD NEED LONG BEFORE THEY WERE EVEN BORN.   

I think of this and I am so blessed that God placed Mitchie in my life, I believe GOD KNEW WHAT KIND OF CHILD I WOULD NEED BEFORE HE WAS EVEN BORN. 

Through my sons diagnosis and the journey over the past few years God has given me patience that I didn’t know I had, faith that is unexplainable, courage to fight for my son, trust to never stop believing that HE is a God who hears our prayers, knowledge and discernment over what to do and what not to do, he has taught me what true LOVE looks like, the selfless love that we aren’t naturally born with.  He has also given me the desire to not just go through this and help my son grow and be the best he can be but I think there is more that He will do through this journey I am on.  We all have been tested in our lives and I believe all tests can end up being our testimony to share.   Over the past 6 years, I have found that there is something in me that LOVES to share.  I share because if something I share helps just one person then that is all that matters.  God is working in me to reveal to me what part of this journey will be our testimony to share so that someone else may benefit from it, so that someone else will know they are not alone, so that someone else would have someone to turn to. 

I am blessed to have my son in my life because he has taught me so much!!!   He has taught me the importance of realizing that WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT…..PERIOD.  And he has taught me to LOOK beyond the outside appearance of people…because if you saw my son you wouldn’t think he was autistic.  He has taught me that even though I KNOW he loves me, sometimes he can’t show love back, when he says “NO momma, leave me alone”.   He has taught me to TREASURE the little things, the small strides,  and to be sensitive to EVERYTHING, the way he processes things is so different and for all of this I am blessed and thank God for knowing just what kind of child I would need.